Saturday, April 23, 2005

Top Ten Reasons to Have Children

10.-- So you can learn when they are infants that although you really can't rock them to sleep, you can rock yourself to sleep while holding them, and still not drop them.
9.-- So you can experience the joy of finding them when you're sure they have been kidnapped and you've cried for an hour, and still not kill them.
8.-- So you can worry all their lives about whether they are happy, and what you did to screw them up.
7.-- So you can learn how to give them the last chicken leg, or the last bit of potato salad, and not feel hungry, but just enjoy watching them eating it.
6.-- So you can hear daily how old you are getting and how far behind the times you are.
5.-- So you can explain every year that the three hundred dollar computer monitor they want for Christmas is not possible if you expect to buy for the other twenty people on your list, too.
4.-- So you can see the way they enjoy spending time around each other at Christmas.
3.-- So you can have them tell you the changes you need to make in your life, from all their sixteen years of experience, and have them be right.
2.-- So you can experience lying awake at night until you hear their tires in the driveway.
And the number one reason.
1.-- So you can see yourself learn your capacity for crying when they to go to school for the first time, or stand up to accept an award, or get married.

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