Keepin' On Truckin'

It's been a good week. I've gotten so much done in the house. I feel like one of those sidetracked home executive sisters that is finally digging my way out of the clutter. I have my entire dining room table piled as full as it will go (and it still has the leaf in it from Christmas) and I'm waiting on my friend to come get this stuff. If she doesn't get here before my husband does, he will start going through it and putting it back. So I hope she comes soon.

I went Saturday with my son to buy a new truck. He did an internship and they hired him after graduation, so he can finally replace his old car. It's been a good car that saw him through all his college years, but it's got 130K miles on it, and he has been wanting a truck a long time. He got a dark red Toyota Tacoma and it's PURTY. He's so excited over it, and I'm so happy for him. He picked it up last night and sat out there in it a long time, looking it over. He says he's looking for an apartment, so I don't expect him to be here much longer. I actually offered for him to live upstairs and pay us some rent, but he assures me it's TIME for him to move out.

I saw the counselor yesterday, and told her how I feel such sympathy for people when others are putting them down or treating them badly. Even if they are bad people and deserved it. She said it's because I identify with the "victim role." I'm not sure I understand exactly what she meant, but I figure it means that since I've allowed myself to be victimized by crazy men and others during my life, I sort of got used to it, and failed to step up and set boundaries and take care of me....thus I continue as the "victim."

See, I even felt sorry for Sadaam Hussien, which tells you something right there.... Anyway, I asked her how I stop doing this, and she said me coming to therapy is a good start. She said even though I may not realize it, I have changed so much in the time I've been seeing her. I told her I realize it in a lot of ways. I'm healthier emotionally now, and I don't think I'd ever let myself be treated by men like I've allowed in the past. Being older helps, too.

Tomorrow we go to see the doctor in the town where my daughter lives, to get a recheck on my eye surgery. We are going to spend the afternoon with her, and then meet her husband later so we can all have dinner together. I'm really looking forward to it. I haven't seen her since Christmas, and even though she sends me updated "belly" pictures, I want to see her. I miss her a lot.