My husband and I decided we wanted a trip this weekend, but not too far, and not too expensive. Friday morning we decided to drive to Birmingham and spend a night at the Wynfrey. I'd heard wonderful things about the Wynfrey, and while I think the lobby is magnificent, the rooms really were not what I expected. Sort of outdated, furniture old and scratched up, smaller than I had imagined, and a small no-frills hotel bathroom. Nothing like the room pictured on their website under "accommodations". (I think the nicest room I've had was at the Beau Rivage in Biloxi. I opted for the "honeymoon package" at the Wynfrey which included champagne, a rose on the pillow, free parking, and a room service breakfast (delicious). We also went to Shula's for dinner and although I never thought I'd say this, it was the best steak I've ever had. We went shopping in the Galleria. The best part of shopping was Build a Bear. I made myself one, and hubby made a "red hat" one for his mom for Christmas. We spent the whole weekend with no television, which was the best part. I finally felt like I got to talk to my husband.
On Saturday, we met my daughter and son-in-law at an Italian restaurant and then went to a do-it-yourself craft place that was listed in Southern Living. I painted a large crock to add to the collection of salt-glazed ones on the top of my kitchen cabinets (mostly Rowe, mostly Christmas gifts). I painted it Mary Englebreit style with the black/white checkerboard and bright colors. My daughter did one in cream with a green ivy vine, and my husband did a dolphin for his daughter and a dog for my middle son (he collects dog figurines since boyhood). If you've never experienced one of those craft places, try it. It's great.
It was a lot of fun, and very nice to get away from home for awhile.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
Thursday, June 23, 2005
GI Story as Promised
Ok, I promised I'd write this one next...I had this girl in one of my junior classes in high school, and she hadn't really talked much to me all year. All of a sudden she gets really nice, and I thought, wow. She really likes me. That weekend she asked if I could spend the night at her house. My mom said sure. So I pack and off I go. When I get there, she says she has this date with a GI from out on the base, and she's been sneaking to see him, but her mom said she could actually go out with him if she double-dated. So that's where I came in. He had this friend.....You know how that story goes.
So I figure what the heck. One night won't be so bad even if he's awful. I'll do her the favor, you know?
So we get all dolled up. And these two guys pick us up. I'm thinking mine is kinda sort maybe cute but I was having a hard time getting over the GI haircut (lack of hair). Anyway, we have a nice dinner, and then they decide they want to go to the lookout on the mountain. (yeah, it's a makeout spot but it's also one of the best views of the city you can get.) So we go.
Well we get there, and since I don't know this guy I'm with, we are talking, and he tells me about his family, his sisters, etc back home. And he pulls out this picture from his wallet. It's a family picture and it has this gorgeous guy in it. I said who's he? He said that's me! Ok, so I decided right then and there that if I could imagine him WITH hair he would be gorgeous.
Anyway, he's being really nice, talking to me, and meanwhile in the back seat, my friend and her date are evidently making-out and all of a sudden, she says, "Stop that! I said stop it!" and she opens the door and gets out. It's pitch black on the mountain (no streetlights) and off she goes walking down the road. He had gotten a little too carried away and made her mad so she decided to just get out of the car. Well that left me in the car with two GI's which I really didn't know on a dark mountain, and I decided that I wasn't in the safest situation either, so I got out too. Off she and I go, walking down the mountain, praying we're still on the road and not walking off some cliff, and praying really hard not to step on any wandering snakes. I'm SCARED TO DEATH, and figure she would be too except for being sooo mad. We walk for awhile and then the guy that I was with catches up with us and apologizes for his friend being such a jerk and begs us to get back in the car and he promises he'll take us straight home if that's what we want. So we got back in and went home.
The guy called me the next weekend and asked me for a date. I really wanted to go but my mom said I couldn't go out with a GI unless it was a DOUBLE DATE, so I said FORGET IT.
I don't even remember the guy's name.
So I figure what the heck. One night won't be so bad even if he's awful. I'll do her the favor, you know?
So we get all dolled up. And these two guys pick us up. I'm thinking mine is kinda sort maybe cute but I was having a hard time getting over the GI haircut (lack of hair). Anyway, we have a nice dinner, and then they decide they want to go to the lookout on the mountain. (yeah, it's a makeout spot but it's also one of the best views of the city you can get.) So we go.
Well we get there, and since I don't know this guy I'm with, we are talking, and he tells me about his family, his sisters, etc back home. And he pulls out this picture from his wallet. It's a family picture and it has this gorgeous guy in it. I said who's he? He said that's me! Ok, so I decided right then and there that if I could imagine him WITH hair he would be gorgeous.
Anyway, he's being really nice, talking to me, and meanwhile in the back seat, my friend and her date are evidently making-out and all of a sudden, she says, "Stop that! I said stop it!" and she opens the door and gets out. It's pitch black on the mountain (no streetlights) and off she goes walking down the road. He had gotten a little too carried away and made her mad so she decided to just get out of the car. Well that left me in the car with two GI's which I really didn't know on a dark mountain, and I decided that I wasn't in the safest situation either, so I got out too. Off she and I go, walking down the mountain, praying we're still on the road and not walking off some cliff, and praying really hard not to step on any wandering snakes. I'm SCARED TO DEATH, and figure she would be too except for being sooo mad. We walk for awhile and then the guy that I was with catches up with us and apologizes for his friend being such a jerk and begs us to get back in the car and he promises he'll take us straight home if that's what we want. So we got back in and went home.
The guy called me the next weekend and asked me for a date. I really wanted to go but my mom said I couldn't go out with a GI unless it was a DOUBLE DATE, so I said FORGET IT.
I don't even remember the guy's name.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Mom told me to....
My mom said if I write things about her, I have to tell something on myself. So I'm going to tell you about one of my worst dating experience from my teenage years. (I'd do the worst ones from the adult years but that would take a week to type.)
Anyway, my best friend was Dolores, and she had been dating Del all through high school. She kept telling me I needed to stop breaking up every two weeks and go steady. (It's called "going out" now but that sounds dumb to me, especially when kids say they're going out and never go anywhere....) Anyway, Dolores and Del took me with them to visit his family, about an hour's drive from where I lived, and there Del introduced me to his brother, Randy.
Well Randy was a cutie. Very quiet and shy but a cutie. That day we went caving. (My mom forbid me to go into caves, so I took extra clothes and left at Dolores' house.) We spent the day together crawling through muddy caves. Loads of fun. (I was sixteen. Everything is fun at sixteen.) On the way home in the van, Randy kissed me and asked me to go steady with him. It took him thirty minutes of trying to ask before he could get up the nerve. I felt so bad for him being so shy, so I said sure. I'd go steady with him.
Well since he didn't have a car yet, and he lived an hour away, I didn't see him for awhile. We talked on the phone, but I was getting kind of tired of sitting at home on weekends when I was used to going out. A guy from school that had asked me out a couple of times (You never say yes the first time.) called, and asked if I wanted to go to to movie...Ok, so I shouldn't have gone, but I wanted to go somewhere and this guy was sweet. He was a DJ in Huntsville and used to dedicate songs to me on the radio. Awwww.. He came by later to pick me up and we went to the movie and had a great time. On the way home, he turned down my street, and I saw a strange car in my driveway. I called home to see who it was, and my mom said it was Randy!
Meanwhile, my Mom was having quite an adventure at home. Randy had come to see me, and Mom didn't want to tell him I was out with another guy, so she said I had gone to see my sister. He asked if he could come in and wait. She said ok but I might be gone a long time. He said he'd wait. (geez) Anyway, a little while later, my sister drops by for a visit with her kids. My mom freaks. She runs to sis and says, "Well hello, Emily!!" Emily is the next door neighbor. My sister was puzzled but mom kept looking toward Randy so my sister played along. A little while later, my step-dad came home, and mom freaks again. She says, "Aren't you going to say hi to Emily?" My step-dad assumes she's nuts and goes off to watch the ballgame.
So here I am in the car with the other guy, and I find out Randy is waiting at my house. So as we are pulling up at my house, I said, "I had a nice time. I'll talk to you tomorrow" and I try to get out of the car. Oh no. He's never let a girl out at the curb and he's not starting now. He wants to walk me to the frigging door. I said, no, no you can't. Oh yes, he's going to walk me to the door. So he walks me to the door and I try to go inside but oh, no he has to kiss me goodnight. By this time, I'd have done whatever he wanted just to get his ass to leave. So I kiss him, he leaves, I go in and break up with poor Randy (I'll probably go to hell because I made him cry.)
Randy leaves and my mom threatens to kill me. To this day, whenever we tell family stories she says, "Tell them about what you did to me."
So I did.
P.S. I ended up admitting to guy number two what was really going on. He didn't mind, since I told him we broke up. I went out with him several more times until I met husband number one. I even went parking with him one time on Green Mountain, and we got lost and I was an hour getting home late (but that's another story). I probably would have done better to have kept either one of them than what I ended up with in hubby number one.
Isn't being young fun? Next entry I'll tell you about a blind date I went on so my girlfriend could go out with a guy she knew. We double dated and went parking on the mountain with these two GI's, and we ended up having to walk home down the mountain in the dark (for awhile anyway).
Anyway, my best friend was Dolores, and she had been dating Del all through high school. She kept telling me I needed to stop breaking up every two weeks and go steady. (It's called "going out" now but that sounds dumb to me, especially when kids say they're going out and never go anywhere....) Anyway, Dolores and Del took me with them to visit his family, about an hour's drive from where I lived, and there Del introduced me to his brother, Randy.
Well Randy was a cutie. Very quiet and shy but a cutie. That day we went caving. (My mom forbid me to go into caves, so I took extra clothes and left at Dolores' house.) We spent the day together crawling through muddy caves. Loads of fun. (I was sixteen. Everything is fun at sixteen.) On the way home in the van, Randy kissed me and asked me to go steady with him. It took him thirty minutes of trying to ask before he could get up the nerve. I felt so bad for him being so shy, so I said sure. I'd go steady with him.
Well since he didn't have a car yet, and he lived an hour away, I didn't see him for awhile. We talked on the phone, but I was getting kind of tired of sitting at home on weekends when I was used to going out. A guy from school that had asked me out a couple of times (You never say yes the first time.) called, and asked if I wanted to go to to movie...Ok, so I shouldn't have gone, but I wanted to go somewhere and this guy was sweet. He was a DJ in Huntsville and used to dedicate songs to me on the radio. Awwww.. He came by later to pick me up and we went to the movie and had a great time. On the way home, he turned down my street, and I saw a strange car in my driveway. I called home to see who it was, and my mom said it was Randy!
Meanwhile, my Mom was having quite an adventure at home. Randy had come to see me, and Mom didn't want to tell him I was out with another guy, so she said I had gone to see my sister. He asked if he could come in and wait. She said ok but I might be gone a long time. He said he'd wait. (geez) Anyway, a little while later, my sister drops by for a visit with her kids. My mom freaks. She runs to sis and says, "Well hello, Emily!!" Emily is the next door neighbor. My sister was puzzled but mom kept looking toward Randy so my sister played along. A little while later, my step-dad came home, and mom freaks again. She says, "Aren't you going to say hi to Emily?" My step-dad assumes she's nuts and goes off to watch the ballgame.
So here I am in the car with the other guy, and I find out Randy is waiting at my house. So as we are pulling up at my house, I said, "I had a nice time. I'll talk to you tomorrow" and I try to get out of the car. Oh no. He's never let a girl out at the curb and he's not starting now. He wants to walk me to the frigging door. I said, no, no you can't. Oh yes, he's going to walk me to the door. So he walks me to the door and I try to go inside but oh, no he has to kiss me goodnight. By this time, I'd have done whatever he wanted just to get his ass to leave. So I kiss him, he leaves, I go in and break up with poor Randy (I'll probably go to hell because I made him cry.)
Randy leaves and my mom threatens to kill me. To this day, whenever we tell family stories she says, "Tell them about what you did to me."
So I did.
P.S. I ended up admitting to guy number two what was really going on. He didn't mind, since I told him we broke up. I went out with him several more times until I met husband number one. I even went parking with him one time on Green Mountain, and we got lost and I was an hour getting home late (but that's another story). I probably would have done better to have kept either one of them than what I ended up with in hubby number one.
Isn't being young fun? Next entry I'll tell you about a blind date I went on so my girlfriend could go out with a guy she knew. We double dated and went parking on the mountain with these two GI's, and we ended up having to walk home down the mountain in the dark (for awhile anyway).
Sunday, June 19, 2005
Wild Weekend
Well as wild as things get around here...
Thanks to my friend, Cathy, I submitted several articles to Associated Content and three of them have been accepted for publication. The others are still pending. I made a list of possible articles that I have some expertise in and was surprised at how many came to mind. I haven't been paid yet for the two short stories I sold, but I knew I wouldn't be paid until the publication date in August. I think I need to spend as much time as I can on my "regular writing" and then fill in when I have time to submit articles. Anyway, it's exciting. Thanks to Cathy.
Vertigo and balance problems are both better. I felt well enough Saturday to go with my husband and son to the IMAX in Nashville to see the new Batman. I am not a great lover of superhero movies but I LOVED it. I think it was the best movie I've seen all year. If you haven't seen it, go!
I have my new camera but haven't been able to take any trips to really use it yet. I'm thinking one day this week I'll get out and go to some places here in town where I can really try it out.
The therapist recommended two books this week, so I linked them. I haven't read either of these, but read the reviews and people on Amazon love them. I'm behind on my reading, and have shelves of books I need to read.
If it sounds like my wild weekend was pretty boring, well this is real life, not the movies. Most real life is pretty boring. Maybe not "boring" as much as "routine". But I like routine.
I asked my husband if he had to describe me to someone, what would he say? He said...."Quiet"
Hmmm... I sure don't sound quiet from my blog, do I? Yak yak yak.
Thanks to my friend, Cathy, I submitted several articles to Associated Content and three of them have been accepted for publication. The others are still pending. I made a list of possible articles that I have some expertise in and was surprised at how many came to mind. I haven't been paid yet for the two short stories I sold, but I knew I wouldn't be paid until the publication date in August. I think I need to spend as much time as I can on my "regular writing" and then fill in when I have time to submit articles. Anyway, it's exciting. Thanks to Cathy.
Vertigo and balance problems are both better. I felt well enough Saturday to go with my husband and son to the IMAX in Nashville to see the new Batman. I am not a great lover of superhero movies but I LOVED it. I think it was the best movie I've seen all year. If you haven't seen it, go!
I have my new camera but haven't been able to take any trips to really use it yet. I'm thinking one day this week I'll get out and go to some places here in town where I can really try it out.
The therapist recommended two books this week, so I linked them. I haven't read either of these, but read the reviews and people on Amazon love them. I'm behind on my reading, and have shelves of books I need to read.
If it sounds like my wild weekend was pretty boring, well this is real life, not the movies. Most real life is pretty boring. Maybe not "boring" as much as "routine". But I like routine.
I asked my husband if he had to describe me to someone, what would he say? He said...."Quiet"
Hmmm... I sure don't sound quiet from my blog, do I? Yak yak yak.
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Men....Geez
My daughter was cleaning off her computer and found a letter her father wrote her in 1997, four years after our divorce. I X'd out some of the names to protect the privacy of my children. I think the letters are self-explanatory.
>Date: Wed, 09 Apr 1997 07:15:36 -0500
>To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
>From: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
>
>At 01:37 PM 3/29/97 -0600, you wrote:
>> As you know, I'm employed at SCI abd I still make $2.00 per hour
>>less than the child support is based on. I am living on a minimum income
>>which leaves little. Your brother, XXXX wants to live with me and I
>>want that too, but I can't afford to raise him and send the full rate of
>>support too. As far as your college costs how do you expect me to pay
>>for all of this. I am salaried and I don't receive overtime pay. I don't
>>have any money stashed and you should know that. I know that your
>>grandmother is helping you and that your beloved has offered to help
>>you. So how about having some pitty for me. I've done the best that I
>>could for you all your life.
>> I am happy that you are trying to follow your dreams.I love you with
>>all my heart, but I must be able to live too. It's like you don't
>>have any love for me anymore and I don't understand why. Does it not
>>bother your to see me suffer like this? Do you not think of me at all?
>>Why is it that Im always wanting to see you, but when I do the words
>>won't come out. I look into your eyes and I see only contempt for me. So
>>I make it short and leave. I guess I just answered my own question, or
>>could it be that you really love me, but feel the same when you see me.
>>Don't you want to really find out how you feel about me, after finding
>>out what all the truth is?
> I can send only $10 per month toward your schooling. How about
>>discounting some of the money when you trade your old books in. It would
>>help me some.
Dad,
I am sorry that you’re having a tough time financially. I realize that you
are not “abundantly wealthy” and that you don’t have a fortune “stashed
away.” I cannot believe that you think I am so shallow as to take pleasure
in “seeing you suffer.” However, I am by no means living the life of
luxury, either.
You asked how I “expect you to pay for ‘all of this.’ Well, do you think
I can afford it all? I make $5.50 an hour and work 20 hours a week. I
can’t work anymore hours because I am taking 15 credit hours at UAH during
the day and 10 credit hours at Calhoun at night, in order to graduate as
quickly as possible. Grandmama is NOT helping me financially and never
has. I have not accepted help from XXXXX because it isn’t his
responsibility to pay for my college; we aren’t married yet, and he has
bills of his own. Mama is struggling to get her business up and going, to
pay off student loans and other debts (including lawyer bills which YOU
inflicted when YOU sued her), and to provide a living for us. The only
expenses that Mama helps me with is my car insurance, food, and shelter. I
pay for all other expenses, including gas, car maintenance (my car is seven
years old and has been wrecked), books, clothing, etc., with my
“extravagant” salary of $100 per week.
The child support that you pay (when you pay it) is supposed to be support
for my brothers only. As for me, YOU agreed before a judge to pay half
of all my college costs which are not covered by my pell grant and academic
scholarship. The amount not covered by these sources of financial aid is
only a small percentage of my overall college expenses. In fact, ALL of my
tuition is covered with the exception of summer semester. I am trying to
reduce this cost by taking classes at Calhoun, which is half the price of
UAH. I am not asking you to pay a tremendous amount, only what YOU agreed
to pay. I alone am paying for the other half of these expenses, and I make
a lot less money than you do. And as for my old textbooks, I DO trade them
in, and I use that money toward school supplies (i.e. notebooks, computer
disks, pens, pencils, etc.) which I haven’t been sending you the bill for.
I’m not trying to be hateful or to make you go “bankrupt.” I’m only trying
to get through school, and I’m working as hard as I can.
You said in your e-mail that I should have some “pity” on you. Well, I
don’t. Everything that occurs in your life is the result of the decisions
that YOU make. For as long as I can remember, you have blamed everyone
else for everything that has ever happened to you in your life. You blamed
your parents for “messing you up” as a child, when it was up to YOU to make
the best of the situation and to move on with your life. You blamed Mama
for the failure of your marriage, when it was YOU who were unfaithful to
her and told her she could either “like the way things were or get out.”
You blamed the company where you worked for firing you when it was YOU who wouldn’t go to
work because of the snow, even when they warned you ahead of time to come
to Decatur and stay in the motel. You blamed me for “turning XXXX against
you”, when it was YOU who, early in the divorce when XXXX got Mama to ask
you if he could come stay with you one weekend when XXXX was coming, told
Mama that she was “manipulating your visits” and that XXXX couldn’t come.
As for me “knowing all the truth,” I DO know the truth. I know that you
don’t care about anyone but yourself, not even your own children. Being a
father includes much more than financial support. You have NOT “done the
best that you could for us all of our lives.” No matter what you want to
think, things were not all “peachy” before the divorce. You used to scream
and cuss at XXXX until he would go off to his room crying. You used to
tell XXXX that you “couldn’t wait to go to work so that you could get away
from him.” You told me that I was a “bitch” when I didn’t want to babysit
for our neighbors one night. I was ashamed to bring home friends because
you used to scream and cuss at XXXX and XXXX in front of company. You
used to holler and cuss at us on the way to church because we were running
late or because XXXX and XXXX were arguing, or some other trivial thing.
Our house was usually in emotional turmoil, because we never knew what kind
of mood you would be in next. And after the divorce, you just up and left
us in the middle of the night, without telling us goodbye or anything, at a
time when we were young and upset about the whole ordeal and needed a
father the most. Then you had no contact with any of us for three months.
Then you quit providing any income for us (we didn’t even have money for
lunch or school and had to go on foodstamps to buy groceries) while you had
a well paying job at XXXXXX and were only supporting yourself. You
gave up custody of us because you didn’t want to help pay our medical
bills, and you held up the sale of the house because you didn’t want to
help support us. You took your contempt of Mama out on us, and put us in
the middle of your conflicts, a place where three children do not belong.
And today, you know nothing about what is going on in our lives, and have
shown no interest to find out. What do you care what I did during spring
break? You never cared to know what I did during spring break last year or
the year before that. You don’t even know my fiance’s name for sure! So
in since you were wondering why there seems to be “contempt in my eyes,”
read this letter and think about what I have just said.
Friday, June 17, 2005
Mom's Camping Trip
Mom's Camping Trip
Sometimes life is stranger than fiction. Also, more interesting. As I said in the last blog entry, my step-dad was really into fishing. He really enjoyed anything outdoors. I guess opposites must attract because my mom has major hay fever to trees, grasses, and (again in the last entry) a major aversion to anything creepy or crawly.My step-dad decided he really wanted to get a tent and start taking some camping/fishing trips. My grandfather decided it sounded like a good idea for him and my grandmother.
So they presented the idea to the two women. My mom said immediately that she did not intend to go on any camping trips because she was concerned about snakes. Grandmother nodded her support. My step-dad assured them that where they were planning to go was a campground filled with pine trees, and since snakes can't crawl on pine needles, (They bought that. No, it's not true) they would not have to worry about seeing any.
A few weeks later, off they went, the four of them, with a new tent and all the accessories that accompany living in the great outdoors. The women did their part, stocking up on groceries to make tasty camping meals on the trusty Coleman propane stove. The tent was set up among the pine trees, the cots placed inside, along with all the other paraphernalia.
The first night went fine.The next morning, the men got up early and went out in the boat to catch "the big one". When mom and grandmother saw that it was beginning to rain, they knew the men would be in soon, so they began cooking breakfast. Mom fired up the propane stove, and soon the skillet was sizzling with bacon and eggs.
Mom decided she needed some salt for the eggs, and instructed Granny to get some from one of the grocery sacks in the corner of the tent. As Granny bent over the sack, she saw the last twelve inches of a snake as it crawled under one of the cots.Her first inclination was to scream and get the hell out of there, but seeing Mom with the stove, hot grease, and propane, she feared warning Mom at that moment would cause a major catastrophe. So she walked over and started trying to unzip the door to the tent. Unfortunately, it was a new zipper, and with frantic jerking, all she managed to do was get the zipper stuck.
This really freaked her out and she started tearing at the zipper. My mom, puzzled as to why her mother would want to go out of the tent into what was now pouring rain, said, "Where are you going?"
Granny said, much calmer than she felt, "We have to get out of here."
Mom said, "Are you kidding? It's pouring down rain out there. We can't go out there."
Granny replied, "We have to get out of here!"
When mom asked why, Granny's fear could not be contained any longer and she yelled, "There's a SNAKE IN HERRREEEEEE!"
Granny said with ten seconds and while emitting an ear-splitting scream, my mom knocked her completely aside, unzipped the zipper, and started running down the river bank in her nightgown, barefooted, screaming at the top of her lungs. Of course, this managed to awaken most of the other campers, and when one man stopped her to see what was wrong, she looked down and noticed her nightgown, now soaking wet, and her scream changed from panic to demure.She smiled and said, soft and sweet, "Well, sir, I think we might have us a little snake in our tent."
The man collected his favorite snake-killing tool, a hammer, and followed her back to the tent. She stood a good twenty feet away with my Grandmother, and they waited for him to go in.In a minute or so, he stuck his head out of the tent and said, "Yeah, Lady, you've got a snake in here all right, but it's not a little one."At that, my mom headed back down the riverbank, again screaming at the top of her lungs, with Granny chasing her trying to calm her down.
The man managed to kill the snake and presented it to my step-dad and Grandfather just as they stepped onto the bank. Needless to say, my mom informed my step-dad that his pine needle story was a bunch of crap and that was her last camping trip.
Recently, my daughter and son-in-law decided to take up camping. When she said I might also enjoy it, I emphatically replied, "Hell no."
My husband added his comment, "If it doesn't have air conditioning and room service, Kathy's not interested." He knows me so well............
Sometimes life is stranger than fiction. Also, more interesting. As I said in the last blog entry, my step-dad was really into fishing. He really enjoyed anything outdoors. I guess opposites must attract because my mom has major hay fever to trees, grasses, and (again in the last entry) a major aversion to anything creepy or crawly.My step-dad decided he really wanted to get a tent and start taking some camping/fishing trips. My grandfather decided it sounded like a good idea for him and my grandmother.
So they presented the idea to the two women. My mom said immediately that she did not intend to go on any camping trips because she was concerned about snakes. Grandmother nodded her support. My step-dad assured them that where they were planning to go was a campground filled with pine trees, and since snakes can't crawl on pine needles, (They bought that. No, it's not true) they would not have to worry about seeing any.
A few weeks later, off they went, the four of them, with a new tent and all the accessories that accompany living in the great outdoors. The women did their part, stocking up on groceries to make tasty camping meals on the trusty Coleman propane stove. The tent was set up among the pine trees, the cots placed inside, along with all the other paraphernalia.
The first night went fine.The next morning, the men got up early and went out in the boat to catch "the big one". When mom and grandmother saw that it was beginning to rain, they knew the men would be in soon, so they began cooking breakfast. Mom fired up the propane stove, and soon the skillet was sizzling with bacon and eggs.
Mom decided she needed some salt for the eggs, and instructed Granny to get some from one of the grocery sacks in the corner of the tent. As Granny bent over the sack, she saw the last twelve inches of a snake as it crawled under one of the cots.Her first inclination was to scream and get the hell out of there, but seeing Mom with the stove, hot grease, and propane, she feared warning Mom at that moment would cause a major catastrophe. So she walked over and started trying to unzip the door to the tent. Unfortunately, it was a new zipper, and with frantic jerking, all she managed to do was get the zipper stuck.
This really freaked her out and she started tearing at the zipper. My mom, puzzled as to why her mother would want to go out of the tent into what was now pouring rain, said, "Where are you going?"
Granny said, much calmer than she felt, "We have to get out of here."
Mom said, "Are you kidding? It's pouring down rain out there. We can't go out there."
Granny replied, "We have to get out of here!"
When mom asked why, Granny's fear could not be contained any longer and she yelled, "There's a SNAKE IN HERRREEEEEE!"
Granny said with ten seconds and while emitting an ear-splitting scream, my mom knocked her completely aside, unzipped the zipper, and started running down the river bank in her nightgown, barefooted, screaming at the top of her lungs. Of course, this managed to awaken most of the other campers, and when one man stopped her to see what was wrong, she looked down and noticed her nightgown, now soaking wet, and her scream changed from panic to demure.She smiled and said, soft and sweet, "Well, sir, I think we might have us a little snake in our tent."
The man collected his favorite snake-killing tool, a hammer, and followed her back to the tent. She stood a good twenty feet away with my Grandmother, and they waited for him to go in.In a minute or so, he stuck his head out of the tent and said, "Yeah, Lady, you've got a snake in here all right, but it's not a little one."At that, my mom headed back down the riverbank, again screaming at the top of her lungs, with Granny chasing her trying to calm her down.
The man managed to kill the snake and presented it to my step-dad and Grandfather just as they stepped onto the bank. Needless to say, my mom informed my step-dad that his pine needle story was a bunch of crap and that was her last camping trip.
Recently, my daughter and son-in-law decided to take up camping. When she said I might also enjoy it, I emphatically replied, "Hell no."
My husband added his comment, "If it doesn't have air conditioning and room service, Kathy's not interested." He knows me so well............
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
My Mom's Dead Guy
My mom remarried when I was nine, and my step-dad knew two sentences, "You shouldn't let her do that" and "I'm going fishing." Of course, mom usually took his opinion to heart, so I didn't get to do a lot of things I could have gotten away with if it had just been her, so I was glad when he took his butt fishing.
The thing is my mom really didn't like him to go fishing alone. She imagined great horrors happening to men who went out into the water alone. Finding a fishing partner wasn't usually a problem as he knew a lot of fishing buddies, but one Saturday his fishing buddy cancelled out on him at the last minute, and my mom decided to step in.
I must give you a little background info here. My mom is one of the women, like me, who is petrified of crickets and bugs and crawly things. I think she'd rather face down a lion than have a bug thrown on her, and I agree. And I can only imagine she probably shared my opinions on fishing, too. Sit in a boat, put bait on hook, throw it out there, and sit for hours staring at the water and not talking. Woopeeeee. Hell no.
Anyway, my mom accompanied him that Saturday and all went well as they floated along, until the coast guard boat pulled up. They said they had been searching for a man who had been reported missing by his wife. Evidently he had gone fishing the day before (alone, Mama's nightmare) and had not returned home that night. They described his boat and the man, and my mom and step-dad said they'd keep an eye out.
Hours later, as they were still floating along, my step-dad caught a glimpse of something in the water. Paddling nearer, he said, "Hey, that's a brand new life preserver. I'm going to stop and get that." It was one of those seat type life preservers that looks like a flat cushion with two straps, and it was floating UPRIGHT in the water. When they got nearer, he said, "You know, that's odd for it to be floating like that. I bet that's THAT MAN."
At this point, my mom went into hysterics. "Well don't look!"
To which he replied, "Don't look!?? Are you nuts? I have to look."
Then she went into her begging fit, "Oh God, please don't look. Let's just go get the coast guard. We don't need to look."
He assured her that yes, he was going to look. He leaned over and raised the life preserver slightly and said, "Yep, that's him," and slowly lowered it back in the water.
My mom was crying by that point. "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God."
This quickly changed when she realized that my step-dad was clearing out a place in their boat to put the body.
"Oh Shit, what are you doing? Don't you tell me you're getting him out of there. No way. No, uh huh. Forget that Shit shit shit."
My step-dad said he just couldn't leave the guy in there. No telling where he'd float off to by the time they found the coast guard and got back.
My mom realized he was serious, and she had to come up with a Plan B fast. She told him there was a boat across the river that was visible from where they were. They could go over there, since it wasn't that far, and get them to go get the coast guard, and then he could let her out on the bank, and come back and watch the guy until help came.
He finally consented, went and told the other boat, but neglected to remember the part about letting her out on the bank, and she found herself right back by the dead man, floating again.
(I know this is horribly morbid but it's a true story, I swear.)
They floated along with this guy for what she said "seemed like hours". At one point, my step-dad's fishing line (yes he figured that if he was going to have to sit for hours, he might as well do some more fishing) got caught on the man's clothes. Don't ask me why his line was that close. I don't even want to imagine his reasoning on that one.
My mom begged him to take her somewhere else. He of course, assured her that he was there with her and she'd be ok. Why is it that men assume their mere presence is enough to ward off our mental demons? Even Valium can't do that sometimes, and this was one of those times.
Finally the coast guard came, and she had to be there as they pulled the body out of the water. If you have a weak stomach, skip on down to the next paragraph. She described it as terribly bloated and oozing from every opening.
She cried all the way back to the car, and most of the way home. She had nightmares for weeks.
The poor man's boat never did turn up. The newspaper said he was a good swimmer, but had recent surgery, so they still don't know why he drowned, but since he had his wallet on him, they decided it wasn't foul play.
Needless to say, my mom never never never mentioned fishing with him again.
The thing is my mom really didn't like him to go fishing alone. She imagined great horrors happening to men who went out into the water alone. Finding a fishing partner wasn't usually a problem as he knew a lot of fishing buddies, but one Saturday his fishing buddy cancelled out on him at the last minute, and my mom decided to step in.
I must give you a little background info here. My mom is one of the women, like me, who is petrified of crickets and bugs and crawly things. I think she'd rather face down a lion than have a bug thrown on her, and I agree. And I can only imagine she probably shared my opinions on fishing, too. Sit in a boat, put bait on hook, throw it out there, and sit for hours staring at the water and not talking. Woopeeeee. Hell no.
Anyway, my mom accompanied him that Saturday and all went well as they floated along, until the coast guard boat pulled up. They said they had been searching for a man who had been reported missing by his wife. Evidently he had gone fishing the day before (alone, Mama's nightmare) and had not returned home that night. They described his boat and the man, and my mom and step-dad said they'd keep an eye out.
Hours later, as they were still floating along, my step-dad caught a glimpse of something in the water. Paddling nearer, he said, "Hey, that's a brand new life preserver. I'm going to stop and get that." It was one of those seat type life preservers that looks like a flat cushion with two straps, and it was floating UPRIGHT in the water. When they got nearer, he said, "You know, that's odd for it to be floating like that. I bet that's THAT MAN."
At this point, my mom went into hysterics. "Well don't look!"
To which he replied, "Don't look!?? Are you nuts? I have to look."
Then she went into her begging fit, "Oh God, please don't look. Let's just go get the coast guard. We don't need to look."
He assured her that yes, he was going to look. He leaned over and raised the life preserver slightly and said, "Yep, that's him," and slowly lowered it back in the water.
My mom was crying by that point. "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God."
This quickly changed when she realized that my step-dad was clearing out a place in their boat to put the body.
"Oh Shit, what are you doing? Don't you tell me you're getting him out of there. No way. No, uh huh. Forget that Shit shit shit."
My step-dad said he just couldn't leave the guy in there. No telling where he'd float off to by the time they found the coast guard and got back.
My mom realized he was serious, and she had to come up with a Plan B fast. She told him there was a boat across the river that was visible from where they were. They could go over there, since it wasn't that far, and get them to go get the coast guard, and then he could let her out on the bank, and come back and watch the guy until help came.
He finally consented, went and told the other boat, but neglected to remember the part about letting her out on the bank, and she found herself right back by the dead man, floating again.
(I know this is horribly morbid but it's a true story, I swear.)
They floated along with this guy for what she said "seemed like hours". At one point, my step-dad's fishing line (yes he figured that if he was going to have to sit for hours, he might as well do some more fishing) got caught on the man's clothes. Don't ask me why his line was that close. I don't even want to imagine his reasoning on that one.
My mom begged him to take her somewhere else. He of course, assured her that he was there with her and she'd be ok. Why is it that men assume their mere presence is enough to ward off our mental demons? Even Valium can't do that sometimes, and this was one of those times.
Finally the coast guard came, and she had to be there as they pulled the body out of the water. If you have a weak stomach, skip on down to the next paragraph. She described it as terribly bloated and oozing from every opening.
She cried all the way back to the car, and most of the way home. She had nightmares for weeks.
The poor man's boat never did turn up. The newspaper said he was a good swimmer, but had recent surgery, so they still don't know why he drowned, but since he had his wallet on him, they decided it wasn't foul play.
Needless to say, my mom never never never mentioned fishing with him again.
Saturday, June 11, 2005
Mother- In- Laws
My mother-in-law is coming in two weeks for a visit. My husband is an only child and we live in Alabama, while she lives far away in Arizona. We rarely get to see her, usually only at Christmas so I started inviting her to come mid-year also. I like her, so it's not a problem, except for the crazies I get about having the house "just so" when she comes.
Now that I have major balance problems, I can't get much done, and it's driving me nuts. The doctor's office assured me that my "brain" will compensate for the lack of information it's getting from my right inner ear now that they have killed the balance center and that my balance will improve. I read an article that says the imbalance gets progressively worse for a few weeks, then peaks, then starts improving.
The thing is, I don't have a few weeks since she's coming in a few weeks! So I enlisted my husband's help in cleaning out the junk from the guest room. He has been great about helping, so I think we'll be okay. He keeps reminding me that his first wife didn't clean at all, ever (she was a horrible housekeeper) and that anything I do will be a huge improvement to his mother. But that isn't a great comfort.
My counselor recommended I read two new books this week, one about women and the self-talk we put ourselves through, and the other is about spiritual things. I haven't read either yet, but have them on order, and I put the links on this page on the lower left side.
Now that I have major balance problems, I can't get much done, and it's driving me nuts. The doctor's office assured me that my "brain" will compensate for the lack of information it's getting from my right inner ear now that they have killed the balance center and that my balance will improve. I read an article that says the imbalance gets progressively worse for a few weeks, then peaks, then starts improving.
The thing is, I don't have a few weeks since she's coming in a few weeks! So I enlisted my husband's help in cleaning out the junk from the guest room. He has been great about helping, so I think we'll be okay. He keeps reminding me that his first wife didn't clean at all, ever (she was a horrible housekeeper) and that anything I do will be a huge improvement to his mother. But that isn't a great comfort.
My counselor recommended I read two new books this week, one about women and the self-talk we put ourselves through, and the other is about spiritual things. I haven't read either yet, but have them on order, and I put the links on this page on the lower left side.
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Getting Drunk without Drinking
I thought the ear surgery had helped with the Meniere's but now I have a totally different problem. Before surgery, I had vertigo, which was a sensation that the world was spinning around me and the nausea that goes with that, but I could still walk around without falling. After surgery, it is dizziness from lack of balance. I get up and feel like I'm falling. I stagger and feel like someone is tipping the world to throw me off. I hate this, and so today I haven't left my recliner. I guess I'll have to call the doctor back tomorrow.
My days have become a routine of writing, editing, and submissions. I manage to submit a minimum of one story a day, but most of the time it's two or three submissions. I'm finding more and more markets. I also read the stories that were selected, or excerpts from them, and I think my writing is at least as good as those. I also went back and re-read some of the stories I had written from the 98-99 time frame, and I'm much better than I was then. (I edited them, added to them, and actually submitted some of those, but I still have a lot to learn). My friend, Cathy, sent a story of hers and I was so happy to be given the opportunity to make a few suggestions, and also tell her of a market I found that I think would be perfect for her story about picking cotton as a young girl.
I have picked cotton, but it was one day when I was about five, and my dad stopped the car on the side of the road to let us get out and pick a couple of bolls of cotton. I was very disappointed that cotton doesn't come out of the boll feeling like a cotton ball, but it is full of hard seeds.
Those seeds are a devil to pick out by hand, too.
This weekend my husband is taking me to the Grotto in Cullman to take some pics with my new camera. It's beautiful there. They have the prettiest magnolia trees I've ever seen.
I found a ceramic shop near Birmingham where you pick out a piece of pottery, paint it with paints they provide, and then leave it to be fired. My daughter and I are going to make it a girls' day out and do that one Saturday soon. It's only been a couple of weeks since we went to Panama City with her and her husband and I miss her already. I wish she lived closer.
My husband has the day off tomorrow, so I guess I won't be blogging again until Monday. If anyone is reading this, have a great weekend.
My days have become a routine of writing, editing, and submissions. I manage to submit a minimum of one story a day, but most of the time it's two or three submissions. I'm finding more and more markets. I also read the stories that were selected, or excerpts from them, and I think my writing is at least as good as those. I also went back and re-read some of the stories I had written from the 98-99 time frame, and I'm much better than I was then. (I edited them, added to them, and actually submitted some of those, but I still have a lot to learn). My friend, Cathy, sent a story of hers and I was so happy to be given the opportunity to make a few suggestions, and also tell her of a market I found that I think would be perfect for her story about picking cotton as a young girl.
I have picked cotton, but it was one day when I was about five, and my dad stopped the car on the side of the road to let us get out and pick a couple of bolls of cotton. I was very disappointed that cotton doesn't come out of the boll feeling like a cotton ball, but it is full of hard seeds.
Those seeds are a devil to pick out by hand, too.
This weekend my husband is taking me to the Grotto in Cullman to take some pics with my new camera. It's beautiful there. They have the prettiest magnolia trees I've ever seen.
I found a ceramic shop near Birmingham where you pick out a piece of pottery, paint it with paints they provide, and then leave it to be fired. My daughter and I are going to make it a girls' day out and do that one Saturday soon. It's only been a couple of weeks since we went to Panama City with her and her husband and I miss her already. I wish she lived closer.
My husband has the day off tomorrow, so I guess I won't be blogging again until Monday. If anyone is reading this, have a great weekend.
Saturday, June 04, 2005
Lost One Somewhere.....
"Now where did I put that?" That's a common thing for me to say lately. It's followed closely by "What did I come in here to get?" and "There was something I was suppose to remember....hmm..."
Yesterday I started a post on this blog. I saved it as a draft. Today it's gone. Now that's not the bad part. The bad part is I really liked that post, but I don't remember what it was about!
Yes, I have CRS disease (can't remember shit) and lately I think it's advanced.
However, to my credit, I did manage to finish another story yesterday, ran it through my two critics (husband and daughter), changed a few things and sent it on. I submitted it to two publishers and now we'll see. I think it's one of my better ones. I went it about differently from my normal pattern.
I decided I had to write one about "women in midlife" because a couple of books had a "stories wanted" feeler out about that subject. And who better to write about THAT than ME. So I decided to spend a couple of days thinking about it. The other morning, the alarm went off WAY TOO EARLY. And I'm lying there, mad, because I can't go back to sleep even though I am still tired, and it comes to me! THE idea for this story. (yes I wrote it down quickly before I forgot). Then I spent all morning yesterday doing research BEFORE I WROTE. Usually I write and then research and go back and fill in correct facts. I also did my "snippets" beforehand. I used to call it that in college. It's a cheat sheet of idioms or descriptive terms I want to use in whatever I am writing. Things like "as the dog thump-thumped his tail against the wood floor boards" or "the hot skillet hissed as it was eased into the sudsy water" etc etc.
Then I sat down to write. And it flowed so much easier. And I finished it and declared it to my my very favorite. So I submitted it to both editors and we'll see....
I've decided if I spend each weekday writing and submitting, then sooner or later, receiving checks will get to be a regular activity too! I read an article by Stephen King. He said he never worried much about the critics, because by the time they said what they had to say, his check had already been cashed. ha. Amen Stephen.
I LOVE the laptop, after I figured out cutting my fingernails off short made it so much easier to type.
And the best news of the day! My CAMERA IS FINALLY ON IT'S WAY and I can share with all of you some of the awesome places and things I love around here.
Have a great weekend.
Yesterday I started a post on this blog. I saved it as a draft. Today it's gone. Now that's not the bad part. The bad part is I really liked that post, but I don't remember what it was about!
Yes, I have CRS disease (can't remember shit) and lately I think it's advanced.
However, to my credit, I did manage to finish another story yesterday, ran it through my two critics (husband and daughter), changed a few things and sent it on. I submitted it to two publishers and now we'll see. I think it's one of my better ones. I went it about differently from my normal pattern.
I decided I had to write one about "women in midlife" because a couple of books had a "stories wanted" feeler out about that subject. And who better to write about THAT than ME. So I decided to spend a couple of days thinking about it. The other morning, the alarm went off WAY TOO EARLY. And I'm lying there, mad, because I can't go back to sleep even though I am still tired, and it comes to me! THE idea for this story. (yes I wrote it down quickly before I forgot). Then I spent all morning yesterday doing research BEFORE I WROTE. Usually I write and then research and go back and fill in correct facts. I also did my "snippets" beforehand. I used to call it that in college. It's a cheat sheet of idioms or descriptive terms I want to use in whatever I am writing. Things like "as the dog thump-thumped his tail against the wood floor boards" or "the hot skillet hissed as it was eased into the sudsy water" etc etc.
Then I sat down to write. And it flowed so much easier. And I finished it and declared it to my my very favorite. So I submitted it to both editors and we'll see....
I've decided if I spend each weekday writing and submitting, then sooner or later, receiving checks will get to be a regular activity too! I read an article by Stephen King. He said he never worried much about the critics, because by the time they said what they had to say, his check had already been cashed. ha. Amen Stephen.
I LOVE the laptop, after I figured out cutting my fingernails off short made it so much easier to type.
And the best news of the day! My CAMERA IS FINALLY ON IT'S WAY and I can share with all of you some of the awesome places and things I love around here.
Have a great weekend.
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