Rabbi, What Big Teeth You Have

We had a nice Thanksgiving, but we didn't get to spend it together as we usually would. My son's girlfriend had a cold, so my daughter couldn't bring the baby over, since her lungs are compromised from the CDH. My daughter stayed at my middle son's apt. We spent Saturday with the youngest son and his girlfriend, and Sunday with my daughter, granddaughter and middle son. We ate "real" carbs on Saturday for the first time in quite awhile. Mashed potatoes, fried peach pies. I don't think I have been missing anything.

I cooked all morning Saturday, and by the time everyone got here for lunch, I was burning up with a combination of cooking heat and hot flashes. I really had no appetite so just nibbled at lunch. My mom brought a German chocolate cake, which is still sitting in my kitchen, and I've not had one piece.
BUT, I did go buy some new jeans on Saturday, and I wear a size smaller than I did. That feels better than the chocolate cake would taste.

I saw the therapist today, and I told her I am totally intimidated by the Rabbi at our temple. I told her even though I'm fifty-one, I feel FIVE when I'm around him. Maybe he reminds me of my father, I don't know. But now that I've talked through it, I intend to not let him intimidate me anymore. How am I going to avoid that? I'm going to talk myself through whatever he says or does that causes me the anxiety, and figure out what to say or do to prevent it. Am I the only person that can think of great things to say to stand up for myself AFTER the situation is over? That is SO frustrating.

No Carbs, Jeans, or Memory

Thanksgiving looms. Ours will be delayed until Saturday due to the kid's work schedules and travel plans. I have a lot of last minute things to do to get ready, and unlike Amy, I don't have enough presence of mind (is it present at all?) to make a list. I just think of something and try not to forget it until I get it done. Then I think of something else. The grocery list I did make a formal list of, but that's only because my biggest pet peeve is taking the time to go into the kitchen to do something with the meat I thawed out, only to find I don't have all the ingredients.

Friday we went to service. It was suppose to be a "sit and learn" service according to the bulletin they mail out monthly. We arrived, in casual clothing (my everyday stuff, my husband in jeans) to encounter the Rabbi in a suit and tie in the foyer. Uh oh. Then we entered the dining area to find all the women dressed up. Uh oh again.

I haven't quite figured this out. We dress up and go, and everyone will be dressed casually and look at us like, "Why are you so dressed up?" Then we dress casually, and that will be the time everyone is dressed up. I'm confused. I would suggest they put a dress code suggestion by each activity so we would know. I did figure out we dress up for bat/bar mitzvahs so I kept watching to figure out why all the dress up that evening, but I never did figure it out. We had our normal service, some refreshments afterward, and then sat down at the tables to hear the Rabbi do a short lesson on the Psalms. No special announcements, unusual guests, baby naming, bat/bar mitzvahs, nothing unusual. So what will happen is this week we will dress up, and everyone else will be casual. There ya go.

I've stopped baking challah because we are on this low carb thing, and when I do make it, I like to put raisins in it, which are definitely a no-no when you're trying to eliminate sugar. Add to that the fact that I don't care much for most bread, but I LOVE challah, and when it is in our home, I keep pinching off another piece, and another piece all day until it's gone. However, on passing up the challah on the eve of Shabbat, a nice man said to me, "Challah is not food for the body. It's food for the soul!" That may be true, I suppose, but I have a hard time cheating on the low-carb thing for fear I'll toss out the whole idea of sticking with it.

We've done great so far. At first I could tell I was losing. My clothes were getting looser, I could tie my shoes without my eye balls popping out, and I could cross my legs more comfortably. The last week, I feel bloated and miserable and wonder if I'm losing anything. I keep thinking if I tough it out and drink more water, this will be a passable plateau.

We went to the temple's annual Chanukah Sale on Sunday to find the parking lot packed and people scurrying to grab things like a red light special at K-Mart. We looked at all the Chanukah decorations, couldn't decide what to get, and so we bought a Hadvalah set. (The Havdalah service marks the end of Shabbat. It is performed on Saturday night normally about 45 minutes after sundown. Items needed: a glass of wine or other liquid, some fragrant spices, and a special braided Havdalah candle.)We are adding to our Judaica items, and decided rather than going all out decorating for Chanukah (My husband is going to be gone for the first three days of Chanukah on a business trip) we thought we would add something we wanted to get anyway, when we could afford it.



Well I better start trying to figure out what I need to do next to get ready for the kids coming home this Friday. Put clean sheets on guest beds, put towels in guest bathrooms, clean out sewing room/front guest room so it looks less of the first and more of the second, .....and on it goes....

Babies, Pork ,and Nails

Doesn't that picture just make you want to say, "Ahhhhh..."

Tomorrow we are going to go with my daughter to take my granddaughter to the doctor. She is doing so well, gaining weight, and her lungs are continuing to develop. She was born in July with Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia, and many of the CDH moms who have had babies or lost babies to CDH have banded together to raise awareness of this birth defect by contacting the Governor in each state to declare a day in March of 2008, CDH Awareness Day. This birth defect happens in one of every 1500 births, but most people have never heard of it. It happens more often than cystic fibrosis or spina bifida. I'll be posting more info about it later as the day gets closer.

We went to my son's tonight for Zaxby's salads and watching "House, MD." (I think that's the name of it. We have never watched it, but he thought we would like it, so we're watching it from the beginning. We saw three episodes tonight and really liked it. Man, that guy has a major attitude! I'm glad he's not my doctor. Bedside manner is important to me. We saw the episode where the kindergarten teacher got a tapeworm in her brain from eating pork. Made me think that the Jews may have been onto something with not eating pork. After that show and the graphics it had, Yuck!

Thanks to Whoopi Goldberg, I no longer bite my nails. I used to do the acrylic nails and had manicures every two weeks, back when I was working and had the money and inclination to keep them up. Now that I'm home, I cut them short and developed the habit of biting them when I was nervous or whatever. On the View last week, Whoopi was talking to one of the guest hosts and said she could make her stop biting her nails. She asked her how often she went to the bathroom during the day, how many times she did #2, how often she washed her hands (the woman said often), and if she used a nail brush (no, but who does?). Then she said and how often do you touch doorknobs, phones, elevator buttons, etc, during the day? All of that from all those people who have gone to the bathroom is all over everything you touch, and unless you use a nail brush, it's all right there, under your nails. She said, "Now think about that every time you put that nail near your mouth." Well, it works. I do think about it and I haven't bitten my nails since then.

I had a lawyer who did that once, had a terrible nail biting habit. He had chewed his fingernails, cuticles, etc until they looked pitiful. It was a disconcerting feeling to think your lawyer was that nervous...what would happen in court??? But he did ok, despite his nervous habit.

Well, There Ya Go

Last night was our second class at the Reform temple. Rabbi asked, "Are you living your life by thinking that God is looking down at you, or are you living your life consistently reaching up to God?" This was something he asked each of us to think about. Much of my life, I've lived thinking God was looking down, noting everything I did wrong on a list, looking at me disapprovingly, etc. Last night, I realized God put us here to reach back to him, in our words, actions, how we treat others, what kind of person we are, etc. This was the second week of our class, and we are growing! We had several new people last night, including one black couple, who really asked some good questions. I've never been good at thinking of questions during a lecture. It's when I get home and think over the things I've heard, I think of many questions. By the next week, I've forgotten them. I really should write notes when I read.

As most of your know who read this blog regularly, I've had some success with publishing short stories, and for the last year or so, I have done all my creative writing to meet some editor's submission guidelines. I miss writing just for me. I'm going to try to do more of that--writing a fictional story that is for no one but me. I really think it will help me to get back some of the fun I used to have when I played "make believe" with my characters. I want to reclaim my writing for myself for awhile.

We are doing fine with the low carb eating thing. I really feel like this has been easy, and it's something I could do from now on. I've even gotten out and walked a few days this week. Eating out has been interesting, but we have found most restaurants will happily substitute extra veggies for the high carb sides. I'm even beginning to like broccoli, which was never one of my favorites. It seems like once we stopped the sugar, vegetables taste better.

The kids are coming home for Thanksgiving. I was going to just suggest we all go to Cracker Barrel but that didn't sit right with some, so I'm going to cook, but not as much as usual. We always have WAY too much food.