Friday, November 05, 2010

Ewwww Gross!!

So ok....my daughter read my "update" and said I left out the best story. I told her I was hesitant to leave that story because I didn't want you all to think we were a trashy bunch. ha. But anyway, here goes.
About two months ago, my husband called and said a woman called him at work and said she was the manager of the apt complex where his daughter lives (the one he never hears from unless she wants something). The lady said her husband had been removed and taken to the mental hospital, and she was very upset, and they were there taking pictures..so he went over. I don't really know what her husband did, or how anyone knew anything about him, as he and my step-daughter are both hermits, but the sherriff's office came and got him and took him, with a court order. When they left, the people from mental health and the apt people were surprised to see that he didn't live alone. They said they knew he had a wife on the lease, but no one had ever seen her. Well, the apartment was beyond nasty (Have you ever seen the hoarding show on tv?) and they went in and took pictures.
Of course, she was crying, and my husband called and asked if he could bring her home, and he did. When she walked in the back door, I was all the way at the other end of the kitchen, and the smell made me gag. Her hair was all matted and sticking out everywhere, and she smelled to high heaven..I said, Wait. Let me get you a change of clothes and you can take a shower. I did, and she did, and she came out and smelled just about as bad as she did when she went in. We later found out the last bath she had was over six months ago....or washed her hair, or brushed her teeth (she was missing one of the front ones). I'm a germophobe, so I was freaking out. He tried washing the clothes she was wearing but they were really gross, so he went and bought some. I got all freaked out and was crying, scared to death she was going to move in with us, and scared she was going to bring some kind of bugs into the house. (She said her apt was infested with spiders, roaches, and fleas, and it was...) My husband took her the next morning to the apt, and he called back to say it was beyond anything he could ever imagine. He said he got garbage bags and shoveled garbage into them for hours and cleared a path about two feet from the front door. It took him days to get back to the other rooms. They had a cat that had long since filled the litter box and had gone everywhere for months, years?
He said spider webs were hanging everywhere like a haunted house, and the smell would knock you down. He later found out that the reason no one was bathing is the tub was filled up with trash just like the rest of the house. So if you're wondering, no, I never went over there. My husband said no way could I go, and he was right. He said he knew I'd have a coronary and he'd have to deal with me and that mess. So I stayed home and cried a lot.
Anyway, he and I talked, and we both realized she needed some professional help, so he took her to mental health, but they wouldn't hospitalize her because she was not suicidal or homicidal...but made her an appt to see a counselor in a month (which she did not go to, even though I offered to drive her). My poor husband spent days trying to clean the apt, and he had her helping, but after four or five days they hadn't made a dent. The apt people said they would help, and would send out a crew, so my husband let them as he had to go back to work. The plan was that they would get the trash cleaned out, and then move them into another unit so that they could go in, take out the carpet, fumigate, etc in that one, and that they would never be allowed to have pets, and that someone would be constantly checking on them to see the condition of the place.
Well, that was the plan, but we don't know if any of that ever happened. Her husband got out of the hospital, and despite our efforts, they have not responded to seeing us or us picking them up to go to dinner or anything. So we have no idea what happened. Of course, my husband was very upset that they had been living that way, and that she didn't seem to mind it really bothered him. And now he won't hear from her unless there is a crisis again. But he promised me, she will not live with us.
And yes, I'm a nutcase too, because I spent days washing and rewashing the sheets, scrubbing that bathroom, febreezing by the gallons, and finally got this place into something I wasn't afraid would have their cooties in it. So that's been my BIGGEST news since I last posted...

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is crazy. And sad. And awfully nice of the apartment complex to even allow them to stay.

Forest Lady said...

There is a postscript to this that I forgot to say. The poor cat was skinny and sick, so my husband took him to the vet, and the vet said he was severely anemic, and had congestive heart failure and he had to put it down. We both felt so bad about that, but maybe the little guy is better off. He planned to take it to the vet and then to the humane society anyway.
Yes, Amy, I thought so too! I figured eviction would have been imminent.

Gillian said...

I would have been freaking out, too, that she was going to move in and stay. It's really really sad that she is living like this and doesn't seem to want or know better.

Cathy Meyer said...

This is heart breaking! What happened to this girl that she has become so indifferent to her own life and lifestyle?

She needs help and hopefully she will get it one day from somewhere. Cross your fingers that the next "crisis" ends up with her in the hospital.

Forest Lady said...

Cathy, I think it was a lot of things. She lost her mother at 15 during that "I hate my mother and wish she'd die" phase that teens go through, which had to leave a lot of guilt. She would not go to any type of therapy or grief support, even though my husband did, and he said he never saw her shed a tear, so obviously she didn't deal with it. Then she married this guy who is totally controlling and has made her feel like an idiot, but she thinks he hung the moon and won't let anyone say anything about him.

Cathy said...

She must have been pretty fragile to begin with. Funny how some of us are able to handle adversity better than others.

I found, in my personal experience that the ones who refuse therapy are the ones who need it most.

As long as this guy is around she will remain broken...which may suit her just fine.