Teaching Mrs Madoff About Macaroni

I'm through with all the antibiotics and steriods and I still feel yucky. I go back to the doctor tomorrow to have the chest x-ray repeated. I just feel like I need some major vitamins, an oxygen bar, a personal trainer, energy drink, something!

I finished Twilight and New Moon and am reading Eclipse. Again, I still can't believe I like these books, and I LIKE these books. No, you won't see my running around in a "Bite Me" t-shirt (ha).

I've pared my packing list down to the necessities, and I am still debating whether to check one bag and take a large purse on the plane, or try to carry on my bag. I hate dragging luggage around in an airport, especially with a long layover, but while I've never had luggage lost, this would be a very bad time for that to happen with me leaving Seattle for good two days after arriving.

My son had a very promising phone interview (two actually) yesterday with a company in Huntsville. It would be good if he found a job here soon. I think he'd feel better about moving. They want to interview him in person as soon as he gets here.

My husband plans to put down the new floor in the living room (along with help from my friend's son) while I am gone. I will be so excited to come home and it already be done, and thrilled to say bye-bye to carpet.

I stayed up late to watch Amercian Idol (we Tivo'd it, is that a verb?) and, although I love that black fingernail polish guy's voice, he must have been smoking some heavy duty something to get up and sing "I Walk the Line" in a sitar-type arrangement. It sounded like a guru on crack.
The little blonde who sang "Jolene" was pretty bad. I was pleasantly surprised by the Indian guy and the girl with the flu. So if you don't watch Idol, none of these comments make any sense at all.

Now for my take on the Madoff scandel. I don't feel as sorry for the rich folks as I probably should, but I really don't. However, I would love to see his wife have to shop at K-Mart like the rest of us, and see her excited over a blue light special. I've had my "living on mac and cheese until payday" times, and I know how to cook a million hamburger dishes to stretch a five pound chub pack. I could teach her a thing or two.

The Pups New Do's

Bedroom Re-do

While I was out and about yesterday, killing time while the cleaning lady was here, I decided to re-do my bedroom. I went to Walmart and found a $79 comforter set, marked down to $40 (King size, too!), found two pillows that look like silk for $5 each, bought black out curtains ($16 a panel, four panels). Then I went to Hobby Lobby and found a poster I liked, bought a frame for it (17 and 25) and then picked out flowers to arrange in a vase to match (22). I ended up with a new bedroom, which I really like much better than the stuff I had in there (black and cream toile with dark red drapes, too goth). So here are the pics.

Taco Soup and a Tot

I've been in a cooking mood this week. Today I made taco stew. I will post the recipe below.
Tomorrow, our new cleaning lady comes for the first time. I am going to get up early and take the dogs to the groomer so they won't be underfoot. Then I plan to go to the library and have lunch with my friend.

I'm reading Twilight. I never thought I'd like a teenage vampire book but I'm actually loving this. I sat up late last night reading in bed with my book light.

My granddaughter is getting so big. I couldn't resist posting her vacuuming photo. She looks less baby and more little girl. She is very active now in playgroups, so she's quite a social butterfly. It's hard to believe she will be two in a few months.

My husband and I celebrate our sixth anniversary the end of this month. I'm so glad I finally found a good one. There are a lot of frogs out there.

Taco Soup:
1 1/2 pounds ground chuck, browned and drained
28 oz can diced tomatoes
2 cans beef broth
2 cups frozen whole kernel corn
2 cups salsa
1 medium diced onion
1 medium bell pepper, diced
1 pkg taco seasoning
1 pkg Hidden Valley ranch salad dressing mix

Simmer all day in crock pot. Then add:
1 can creamed corn
1 can pinto beans, drained
1 can kidney beans, drained
1 lb Velvetta cheese, cut into chunks

Continue to simmer until cheese melts. Stir well and serve.

Looking Forward to Spring

I sit and look at the screen, and I think I really should do a new post. What about? Let's see...What has been happening around here lately? Nothing. Well nothing interesting. Well, what is on my mind? All My Children coming on in a little while, highlight of my day since I've been sick, but no one wants to hear about that either..Hm...My life is awfully boring.

Does anyone else do that? Sometimes blogs can be so much fun, but they can also be one more thing on my "Would-a, Should-a" list to do.

Ok, I finished World Without End and The Reader. Started The Curing Season. Trying to figure out what to read next. I went to the beauty shop and that girl swears by the Twilight series, even though she's not into Vampires. So maybe I'll give that a go.

I went "inactive" on Facebook, because I was getting so much email from them everyday and I couldn't figure out how to do most of the stuff on there. Then several people actually missed me being on there, so I reactivated. I also linked my Associated Content material to it, I think, so maybe that will help my page views.

I hate daylight savings time. My internal clock does not like being tampered with. I found this in an article this morning that comfirms that it's a bad, bad idea. ha.

"There's a spike of 5% in heart attacks during the first week of daylight saving time, according to another study published last year. The loss of an hour's sleep may make people more susceptible to an attack, some experts say. When daylight saving time ends in the fall, heart attacks briefly become less frequent than usual."
See?

I'm feeling better post pneumonia, but am still weak. I get up doing things in the house and get winded and tired, but each day I'm able to do a little more.

I am a real germ phobe about motel rooms, and since I know my cross-country trip with my son may end us sleeping in some cheapo places, I decided to get a sleeping bag to lay on the bed to sleep in. I found one and had it shipped to his house. He called today and said, "Geez, it's pink and has fur. I'm glad the UPS dude didn't see it and think it was something I ordered." Hey, the price was right.

I'm still trying to pare down my packing list to only the bare essentials. I ordered three pair of yoga pants that are super comfortable to wear on the trip, so I can just take shirts to swap up. Of course, I'll have to have my Kindle and cell with their chargers. I'm still debating makeup. Who am I going to see anyway? I cut my hair so it's quick and easy to do. I want to maket his trip as easy as possible.

Our governor has decided not to accept the stimulus money for Alabama. I hope he has plenty of his own to kick in when things get worse, which they will. My youngest son is worried about losing his job. He said they are getting rid of people left and right at his station and other stations they own. We may end up with both boys back home before this is all over. I'm so glad my husband works for the government. Job security means so much right now. So does having our mortgage paid off. Still, we are thinking much more seriously about purchases. I guess that is just a sign of the times.

I miss my granddaughter. I'm going to have to take a baby day and go up for a day visit before my trip. I wrote and reminded my daughter to post more pics and video. Maybe I just need to catch them on Skype soon.

I won that writing contest back in October, and since it was more than 600, they sent us a 1099. But they didn't send it until the middle of February, which is the first time I even remembered that money, and after we had filed our taxes. So my husband is busy at the kitchen table today amended both state and federal returns. No matter what, it seems the "extra money" I earn ends up causing us tax problems of some sort, either putting him into a higher tax bracket or something. Still, when a little check comes in, I'm happy. I'm now making an average of $62 a month from Associated Content for past articles and their page views. $62 in mad money is a lot to me. Buys a lot of Kindle books, especially the .99 up to 3.99 ones. Hey, as long as I have books, I am happy.

Dawn Rises on a Whole New Day

Yesterday, the rolling pin thing seemed like a really big deal, and today I don't care as much. I think blogging is a great way to vent and put things in perspective.

I went to the dr today and I have pneumonia, but it's "early" and he loaded me up with yet more medicine. I'm sure it will knock it out this time around, because I have to be well for my trip to Seattle and the drive back to Alabama the 24th of this month.

I'm finishing World Without End, and trying to decide on my next book. I watched the Oprah show today and ordered the Simplicity workbook the girl there had written. I found out it was illustrated and had dividers, and they had me at sold.

I can't seem to sleep without coughing, so I'm sitting up for awhile, hoping I will eventually get really sleepy and then be able to sleep later tomorrow.
We actually got snow on Saturday night, and woke up to white rooftops and yards. It melted off by noon though, but was pretty while it lasted.
Well, i'll make this one short, as I feel crappy and am going to try to go to bed again.

Duck! Here I Come With a Rolling Pin!

Ok, so I did a whole post on how healthy I've been emotionally, how far I've come. Then God showed me to have some humility and that I don't know everything.
I have a rolling pin that belonged to my grandmother. It's old, wood, with red handles, worn and weathered from many years of use. If you had asked me a few days ago, I would have said my grandmother gave it to me, because I thought she did. She gave me a dish towel, an apron, and the rolling pin, I think. Many, many, many years ago.
My niece has a cooking blog, where she posts family recipes and the stories behind them. It's really good. In one recipe she posted recently, she said her mom visited me, and I mentioned having my grandmother's rolling pin, but my sister was shocked. She said Mom had given her a rolling pin, and said it was my grandmother's. So she confronted Mom, and Mom said she didn't want us to not each have one, so she bought an extra from an antique store. Who has the real one? That was my niece's question. I could have been happy from now on, just contently using my rolling pin and thinking of my grandmother. But no. It was not to be. Now I'm wondering if my Mom did give me the rolling pin at some point, and not my grandmother. And it bugs me. REALLY bugs me. I feel hurt, and I wish they had just left well enough alone.
So, you see, they can still hurt my feelings no matter how much therapy I had. I haven't come so far after all. One visit to my house from my sister and I'm back to feeling like a little girl that lost her dolls to her sister during the divorce, because Mom left in such a hurry with me in tow.

Heaven and Heaven, Too.

HEAVEN......


HEAVEN, TOO.

You like me? Good. You don't? That's fine, too.

My sister came, my mom took her on a tour of our home (very short tour to see it all. ha) and then we went to Hobby Lobby. Sis decided not to make snide comments about me, so she made them about others. First she started on my mom. We were in the check out line, with several other people, and she started talking about how my mom got lost in a store the other day, and couldn't figure out how to find her way to the front. She told it in a long, "this is hilarious, Mom is getting really old" type of way. My mom looked embarrassed at the strangers listening to it. I looked at my mom and said, "I do those same kind of things, Mom, all the time." So my sister took it up a notch and told one that was even more embarrassing, so much so I won't repeat it here.

We went to lunch and she talked about her mother-in-law hiding her teeth in her bra when she took them out in a restaurant (it's an old Southern woman thing--My granny used to hide money there, and I have been known to stash cash there myself). Then she talked about my step-mom and what she hopes to get from the house when they die. She talked about her daughters..it just went on and on.

When she started on Obama, and used the "n" word, I actually spoke up and said, "I don't use that word." My mom looked at me like I had two heads, then collected herself and said, "I guess none of us should." My sister just continued to count my heads.

She also said, "Since you went to college, you talk funny." That was because she said, "I ain't got no reason to put out cabbage plants this year, because mama grows more 'n enough for all of us" and I replied, "I don't have a reason to plant them as long as we have a Krogers." Bad English is common in our family, and anyone who speaks differently is "weird." I admit mine is not perfect, but if you met my family, you would see I've come a long way.

I honestly feel nothing she can say to me at this point is going to affect my opinion of myself, which I guess is what emotionally healthy means. I know I just felt so much better yesterday around her, not having to worry about dodging arrows.
I didn't feel nervous when they were here. I felt comfortable to be myself. If my sister had left and not wanted to come back, I would have been disappointed but it would be fine.

As things are, I think we can see each other and be family, and it will be fine now. I don't have unrealistic expectations, and don't need her approval anymore.

Old Me, New Me

My sister and mother are coming today to visit. I have lived here since March of 2000, and this is the first time my sister has been here to visit. I figure my mom is dragging her here, but well, there ya go. I have been noticing a big difference in the "old me before years of therapy" and the "me now" in how I react to things. The old me would have worried about what she would think about my home, what I was wearing (she has been known to made snide comments in the past about both), etc. The old me would have spent two days cleaning.

But the now me went to play cards all day yesterday at the senior center. The new me got up this morninng and made the beds, dusted the coffee table, and wiped down the toilet in the guest bathroom. I think it looks fine, and the new me cares more about that than what anyone else thinks.
The old me would have picked out her clothes today with the thought in mind of "What will she say about this one? Will she think this is too bright?" The new me thought, I like this shirt, it's comfortable, I'll wear it.

Last week when I went to play cards, one of the ladies asked if I would take over the calling tree for reservations (we have to tell the senior center how many we will have because of the lunch). I hesitated and she was very convincing, so I said ok. I figured I will give it a try, so what. Then later in the week, another lady who also has handled this task called, very upset. Who had given me this to do? Why was it given to me instead of to her? She said, "It's not that I don't think you can do it, it's just that I've done it a long time."

The old me would have thought, Oh my, what's wrong with me, she thinks I can't do this, she doesn't trust me, etc. But the new me said, "I didn't want to do it anyway, so you're welcome to have it. In fact, I'll run the notebook by your house in a few minutes." The old me would have avoided going around that woman again, because I felt insecure and had my feelings hurt. The new me went in yesterday, hugged her, and had a ball playing cards.

One of my children reminded me the other day, when I was whining about them leaving home, that when they were teens, I was so wrapped up with a "idiot man who will remain nameless" that they felt neglected. The old me would have been crushed, and would have immediately tried to justify my bad behavior. The new me thought about it a minute, then said, "You are right. That's how it was. I'm sorry, and I wish I could go back and have that time again." Old me, new me. I made mistakes. I can't change them. I can say I am sorry, and do what I can to do better now. Maya Angelou says, "I did then what I knew. And when I knew better, I did better."

Now you can say what you will about therapy, and I realize I spent boo-koos of money on it, but I got results. It took a long time but I do see the progress. Not only that, but my husband sees it.

We were with some friends the other night, when they brought up the Octomom and how she should have her children all taken away from her. I told you my best friend has a huge family, limited money, etc, so I have a difference perspective on this from most people. I also loved kids and may have had a larger family myself had circumstances been different. So when they said her children should be taken away, I added, "I disagree. I think even though she may have shown bad judgement, she still loves her kids, and her kids love her. To take them away now would only hurt the children by dividing them up with people they don't know. If you took away the kids of everyone who had them and couldn't afford them, over half of the kids in America would be in foster care. You can hate her, but don't take it out on the kids. Give her the help she needs to care for them. That's how I feel."

My husband's mouth fell open, and the ladies (aren't women wonderful to talk to) just jumped in and kept the discussion going, actually considering the children's side of things. When we got home, my husband said, "Not only are you out socially now, but you feel confident enough to offer a differing opinion, even when it may not be popular. I am proud of you."
I'm proud of me, too.

Grouchy as Hell

I should have married a Democrat. If I have to watch another Presidential address with my husband's commentary yelled in the background, I'm going to kill him. I told him tonight he sounds like he's been listening to way too much Limbaugh.

My son in Seattle has not found a job and his funds are running low. He is coming home, and has to drive across the country pulling a U-Haul trailer. So he offered to fly me out if I would ride back with him. I'm going March 24, and we are leaving the 26th coming back. Driving down to San Francisco and then across, due to snow and road closings.

Kindle came out with a second version, announced today. I want one, but I won't get one. I LOVE my Kindle, and at what I paid for the first one, it will have to last awhile. I carry it in my purse all the time, and never get stuck in a waiting room without something to read. If I finish a book, no problem...just start another.
I feel terrible. I have been on the antibiotic for a week now, and although my headaches are gone, I feel like someone ran over me with a truck. My step-mother said antibiotics do her the same way. How can the cure make you feel as bad as the illness? Add to that, I have been having major hot flashes this week, and I've been pretty miserable.

We went to play cards tonight, and some of the ladies wanted the heat turned up. I was about ready to take off my clothes, but decided it would scare too many people.
So yes, I'm burning up, grouchy as hell, and feel like crap. Menopause sucks.

Six Words-- What Are Yours?

HarperCollins has a new book out called "Not Quite What I Was Planning" (I know you should underline books but there is no underline button on this blogger thingie) by Larry Smith, in which people write their life stories in six words. For example, one man wrote, "Seventy years, few tears, hairy ears" which of course, illustrates for us clearly that he has had a long life with a few bumps along the way, yet has managed to keep his sense of humor. I also liked this one, "After Harvard, had baby with crackhead." Whew.
It made me think how I would sum up my life in six words, since I have never been a person of few words. I tend to talk things to death, as my ex-husband once said, and was right.

Maybe I would say something like "Novel Life, Skipping Pages and Skimming."
I feel like no one would believe the things I have experienced in my life, but it would make a great novel, and I've done my share of skipping over things I should have paid attention to, and skimming through parts I should have lingered on.

I also thought of "Rooting for Outcasts, Feel Like One." As the counselor once said, I always have a heart for the victim or black sheep of society. Am I not the one writing to a death row inmate and defending people just because they are attacked by others' comments, even when I feel they may deserve it?

How about "Wife, Mom, Homemaker, Looking for Wings." Even though I am happy with my life, I would always like to do something really important and soar for awhile.

I also like, "Mind Open, Eyes Closed, Charging Ahead." That would explain why I get off on such tangents and hit so many brick walls.

One more, "Chocolate, naps, living the good life."

Now, here is your challenge. Tell me some of yours!

The Weekend Again

My husband has been home all week sick with a cold and ear infection. So far, I haven't gotten it. He went to the doctor Monday, was given an antibiotic, was no better and went back today. He now has another antibiotic to take WITH, not INSTEAD of the first antibiotic (ever heard of such a thing?). Our weather has been so screwy, it's no wonder everyone is getting sick. In the 60's one day, below freezing the next, etc.

I posted awhile back that I write to a young man on death row, and that I used to work with his mom. He recently wrote and asked me to call her, gave me the number, and said he was worried because he hadn't heard from her in so long, no card at Christmas, etc, and wanted to know if she was ok. I called and the number he gave me was disconnected.

I remembered another lady who was a good friend to her, and called her to see if I could find out anything for him. I left her a message on her machine, and she called back and left me a voice mail saying she told his mom he was worried, his mom has changed her number, and that is it. Didn't say the mom would contact him or anything. I didn't expect her to give me the new number, as it may be unlisted or something (even though we used to be really good friends and just lost touch when we both took other jobs, never had any kind of a falling out). Now I wonder if she is upset that I am pen pals with her son or something.

I think it was Amy who commented awhile back that maybe his mom had just written him off. I guess that is possible. I guess I will just tell him I passed along his message but was not able to find out anything else.

The carpet guys cleaned my carpet yesterday, and now that it is dry, it looks dirty. I am on my "I hate carpet" kick again, and had a long talk with the other ladies at cards the other day about hardwood vs laminate vs tile. I have to admit I am leaning toward a vinyl or resilient floor for my living room. When my mom retired and built a new house on the river (which my sister now has), she put vinyl throughout. She said it was so much easier to keep clean, which it was. My grandmother had vinyl tile throughout her house when I was growing up. I have looked at Trafficmaster Allure flooring that looks like wood. I really think that is what I am going to do. Especially after talking with the guy at Lowes about what they recommend to care for laminate. (I thought laminate could be mopped; he says no, you need this kit and this stuff, and this, no mopping.)

We went tonight to see Defiance at the movies. Good. Really good. When we got there, I waited in the lobby while hubby got tickets. He came in and said the heat was out in the theatre showing our feature, but he got tickets anyway. I almost froze to death. Brrr.

Dead Tree Readers

I belong to a yahoo group for the Kindle, the e-reader I got from amazon about a year ago. I love my Kindle, carry it everywhere in my purse, always reading in waiting rooms, in the car, etc. However, I'm not against reading regular books, as some books are not available on the Kindle. I find I usually read three or four on the Kindle and then one from my bookcase. (I'm trying to get from four bookcases to one.) However, some people on the yahoo group are really Kindle-ites.
Today I read a post where a reader refers to his mom who prefers paper and ink books as a "dead tree reader" "behind the times" and "living in the dark ages."
With book stores being added to the stores with falling profits, and news articles reporting that young people are not leisure readers, I am just thrilled anyone likes reading. Out of my three children, I have one reader. Thank goodness my "reader" is also raising my granddaughter to be a "reader" too.
I can't imagine my life if I had not loved reading from a young age. It was a form of escape for me during a lot of hard times. I still have mental lists of hundreds of classics I want to read before I die.
Yesterday I spent the day with my dad. His Alzheimers is about the same. He told me about when my uncle was a POW in Germany, although he began by saying HE was he POW, but eventually the story evolved to being about my uncle and not him. My step-sister passed away Friday night and we went to sit with Daddy while my step-mom went to be with her son-in-law and the rest of the family. Daddy reminded us when we got there that Shirley died. Then in awhile he said my step-mom was at the hospital sitting with Shirley because she is in bad shape. I keep thinking I could be like him one day. My husband reminds me that my mom is about the same age and sharp as a tack and I could also be like her.
Anyway, I plan to kick up my "want to read" list and get moving on it. We are going to the funeral home this afternoon. For many years my rule has been that I dont go to funerals. But I am better emotionally now, and I think it will be ok. My step-sister was 65 and died of a stroke. I wasn't very close to her as she was married and had children of her own when my dad and her mom married, but she was a nice lady.
I started keeping a prayer list in a little organizer in my purse a few weeks ago. It started with three names, is now up to nine, one came off (my granddaughter is feeling better after her ear infection.) It seems like so many people are struggling with finances, sickness, and other troubles right now. I feel very blessed to not have any needs of my own on the list right now. No needs but a lot of thank you's. I guess God still loves us "dead tree readers", too.

Oh My!

My hubby and I were watching the View last night (we Tivo'd it) when we witnessed Sigourney Weaver flashing America. Just to be sure, my husband checked the screen closer and she was not wearing underwear. (I was laughing too hard to object.) I don't get the whole commando thing. That is just gross. It seems like one look at that set with cameras aimed straight on and the couch that has to be voted "most uncomfortable ever" that she would rethink the whole skin tight dress idea.

Reading and Ruminating

Not much new around here.
I got to babysit my grandbaby for awhile Saturday. My daughter and son-in-law drove down to put up a new kitchen light for me, and afterward they went out for a little shopping. My granddaughter was feeling bad with a cold, and she mostly sat in my lap while I rocked her. She slept for awhile and watched Yo Gabba Gabba the rest of the time.
My youngest son has started back to college. He went for a semester right out of high school before he began his career as a DJ. Now he wants to go back and take some computer classes and his basics.
My son in Seattle has not found a job yet. He has to make a decision soon about moving. I'm just praying things work out for him. I know he wants to stay there if possible.
My daughter had a birthday!
My husband and I have been using the E-Mealz meal planning service again. We were doing Kroger's since that is where we usually shop, but decided to get off our fat butts and lose some of this weight we've put back on, so beginning on Thursday of next week (when we buy groceries again) we are switching to a Weight Watchers dinner menu. I'm not going to WW. I know enough about what I SHOULD be eating to plan my own breakfast and lunch, and then I will use the planned dinners.
I got new glasses because we have a new vision plan on our health insurance. They are frameless and very light and drive me nuts. (No, not big like Palin's) I guess I'm used to heavier frames as these feel like they are falling off my face all the time.
I finished reading Revolutionary Road. I would say it's a book that the reader will remember for a long time, but it's also a downer. I think the movie with DeCaprio and Kate Winslet will be good. I can see them playing those characters. I also finished Suze Ormans 2009 Action Plan.
Now I'm reading World Without End, which should keep me busy for awhile!
We found this little cafe way out in the sticks that is only open for dinner three nights a week, and has the best steaks I've ever tasted. We are going there with one of our neighbors and her friend on Thursday night. How about that--! Me! Socializing with the neighbors for more than cards!

Mo Mo Mo Money

We decided to pay off our credit cards this year if at all possible. Then we will be totally out of debt. I watched the Oprah show with Suze Orman yesterday, and we sat down last night and listed our expenses, which are wants or needs, etc. We canceled HBO, our spring water service, and the cleaning lady (all wants). We decided our TIVO is a definite need, and so is eating out three days every two weeks (we get paid every two weeks) as long as we don't eat at pricey restaurants.

My husband said he can give up eating lunch out every day if he takes leftovers from dinner.
This came about because my son called to borrow tuition money the other night, and I didn't have it to give him. I felt really badly about it. Like most people, I waste a lot of money, especially since we have a Starbucks now.

Also, I lost weight, got rid of all my fat clothes, gained the weight back, and now have nothing to wear. ha. But you all would be proud of me. I went to the thrift store and bought three blouses still new with tags for five bucks each. I've never been good at saving money, so this is a really good challenge for me.

I told my husband I really do believe that God helps those who help themselves, and after our talk and resolutions on budgeting last night, he called today to tell me his cost of living raise is going to be on next week's check. Not much but a blessing, none the less.

I have to say that writing to the death row inmate has made me a lot more appreciative of what I have. I feel really superficial when I complain about my weight and dieting when he has lost so much weight since his trial because of not having enough food. I complain about having to go out around people when he has no freedom. I complain about having to take medicine when he stays inside in the winter for fear of getting sick and not having the medical help he would need. I think I really need to stop being so ungrateful and complaining so much. My worst day is so far above his best day.

I had to tell the cleaning lady that I can't have her come for awhile, and she was so nice about it. She didn't say it but I got the impression I'm not the only one of her clients cutting back on cleaning help. I would feel worse except I know she has people waiting to get her to clean for them, because she does such a good job. When I was playing cards today, several of the women were talking about their cleaning help, and I asked what they pay for their townhouses, since they are the same size as mine. They pay between 50-60, and I was paying 90. So I guess if we can get someone to clean later on, I'll shop around a bit more.

Anyway, I'm trying to figure out a system to my cleaning, so I don't have everything to do in one day. I figured I can do some on Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and use Thursday as my day for doctor visits and other appointments. Tuesday and Friday mornings are my card days, but since Friday is just until noon, I figured I can get something done that day, too. A lady I know recommended doing my weekly stuff, and then each week concentrating on one room and giving that room some extra cleaning, decluttering, etc. That way every six to eight weeks, the house has a really good cleaning. I have said before I love laundry, but I hate mopping and wiping baseboards. Also my vacuum is sucky around the edges of the carpet, and I hate using the brush thing to clean that. I like dusting and cleaning mirrors. Isn't it funny how some people like some parts of house cleaning that other people hate. Of course, there have been times that I have hated it all.

Reading, Ranting, and the Ridiculous

Books read so far in 2009:
The Rock Orchard by Paula Wall-- it's about the women of the Belle family and other characters in this small town, at the diner, the doc, the preacher, etc. Started out great and I thought for the first ten chapters it was going to be the best book I've ever read, but then the author sort of lost it and tried to package everything up too quickly. I was very disappointed. First half of book 5 stars Last half 2 stars, total score averaged 3.5

Follow the River by James Thorn- Based on a true story about a woman abducted by Indians who tries to make her way back home. This was an old yellowed copy I bought at a used book sale and found tucked into the back of my bookcase. VERY good book. Unbelievable what this woman had to go through, but you won't be able to put it down. They actually made a movie out of this, but the book is better according to what I have read about them both. I'd give this one a 5.0. I would read this over again.

I'm learning to tell people no when asked to do something I know I don't need to do. It's hard for me to say no to anyone. It comes back to that "what if they don't like me" thing. But I figured out if I try to please everyone, then I don't like me.

My MIL leaves tomorrow. I thank you all for putting up with my belly-aching about her being here. I'll shut up now, until she comes back in July.

I have beautiful new tile in my kitchen, and now my light fixture seems to have konked out. It's fluorescent, and I hope it is just a matter of needing bulbs, but it's never acted like this before. It comes on but barely, more of a faint glow, very faint. In the South, we still believe men should fix things (I know my daughter is shaking her head. Ok, old people in the South still believe this.) My husband is not a fixer. That can be very frustrating at times. However, he is great at running errands, so I guess that makes up for his lack of fixing talents. I'm going to try replacing the bulbs tomorrow. I'm still trying to train him about the umbrella thing. Now that's something every man should know about. Men get the car when it's raining and pick up the women at the door. At the very least, they have an umbrella to hold over you. Geez. Where was he raised? Oh yeah, not here.

Since I got my bathroom scales and started watching my weight, I've gained two pounds. Maybe just watching it is not enough. ha.

Pet peeve: Robin McGraw writing books. She is an expert on aging because? Don't tell me it's because she looks so great for 55. If I had her money, I'd look good, too. Really, Dr Phil has taken nepotism to an all time high level. His son is now an expert on bullies, his wife on aging, etc. And how did Dr Phil think himself an expert on wt loss. He has two chins.

Tick tock tick tock............

I think I've pretty much blown all my NY resolutions by now. Must be a new record. I haven't walked one day, had three pieces of pizza tonight, have already ordered three books from Amz (read one and a half though, still behind the buy/read ratio)...On the other hand, I did go to church today, have been nicer to my husband, and have been good to myself. How do I know I've been taking care of myself, you ask?

Well, MIL is still here. I haven't killed her or lost my cool with her. I pretty much have only talked to her when I have to the last few days. She hasn't noticed though. I figured out as long as she thinks everyone is doing things the way she wants, she is happy. And as long as I can call her names in my head, I'm happy. Win-win. Ok, yes I am a bit afraid of what I'm thinking accidentally coming out my mouth (It's your turn to deal the cards, you old witch!) but so far I've been able to handle it. I know. I know. I need more church. ha.


Even women at Sunday school are giving me pity looks when I drag her with me into class Sunday after Sunday. One lady leaned over to her this morning and said, "Are you still visiting?" MIL said yes. Then the lady said, "Thought maybe you had moved here." I won't even tell you what I was saying in my mind at that point.

I gave MY mom a big soft terry robe for Christmas last year. This year she wrapped it back up and gave it back to me (it was not my only present from her.) I loved it. I'm wearing it now. What other family could have a member give you back your present and say it was way too big for her but she figured it would fit my fat butt just fine, and me be happy about it? One of my best presents, actually, besides my son-in-law and daughter giving me the kitchen backsplash and my George Foreman grill. I just hope I'm not going to have to cook anymore for my MIL before she leaves...She's leaving Wednesday, counting the hours........

New Year Resolutions

1. Lose weight. I bought scales. I weighed. I almost passed out.

2. Begin walking at least two mornings a week. I figure that's a good attainable amount of days.

3. Don't buy anything on credit and don't buy another book until I read what I have.

4. Save more money for Christmas next year.

5. Clear all clutter downstairs and quit griping about the upstairs. I can be happy if I really try, with half the house being clutter free.

6. Go to church regularly.

7. Be nicer to my husband.

8. Spend more time with my friend, Dawn. She would love to have a regular weekly lunch, which I should be able to do, and know I would enjoy it.

9. Enjoy the time I have left with my parents. Let the past go and see my sister.

and 10.
Take care of myself emotionally. Speak up for myself. Express my honest opinion when asked instead of going along with everyone else. Allow myself to rest when I'm tired without guilt.